After our son di3d, we adopted a little girl — one evening, she noticed a photo of him, stared at it, and suddenly said, “I know him. He told me not to forget him.”

It only happened because nobody knew.

A four-year-old with a good memory and a whole system with no way of joining two things up, and between those two facts my daughter got home.

I have apologised to Bernadette twice. The second time she said: “You were entitled to one of those. You’ve had two.”

Where things are.

Immy is seven and a half. She is at Cardew Primary and she is sharp and funny and extremely bossy, and she has nightmares about the noise, not the pictures, which the therapist says is common and which I did not know was a thing.

The red rucksack came out of the loft in the February. She has it. She takes it to school on Fridays because Fridays are the day they take their own bags, and it is ridiculous on a child that size and I would not say a word about it if she took it up the aisle at her own wedding.

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