‘A local couple has come forward for the private placement. Carol seems especially eager. I understand Walter has been told only that the birth mother requested a closed adoption. Discretion will be maintained as you requested.’
I sank against the attic wall.
Rebecca.
My daughter Rebecca.
Anna’s eyes.
That was why Anna’s eyes had seemed so familiar.
Rebecca had Anna’s eyes.
For all those years, I’d looked into them without ever knowing whose they were.
Then I found another envelope.
The handwriting on it was more familiar to me than my own.
Carol’s.
It was addressed to my mother.
‘Ruth, I can’t keep doing this. Walter still believes Anna left because she stopped loving him. I heard what you said to her that day, and I should have told him then. I didn’t. Part of me was afraid that if he knew the truth, he’d go after her.’
I had to stop reading.
Then I continued.
‘Now there’s a baby involved. You keep telling me Anna has signed the papers and wants the child placed somewhere else, but that doesn’t make what we did right. If Walter ever learns the truth, he’ll never forgive either of us.’
Below Carol’s letter were four words written in my mother’s handwriting.
‘Then make sure he doesn’t.’
I couldn’t tell Anna over the phone.
—
It was after eleven when I stood at her door again, clutching the letters.
